Look, I'm sorry you had to hear it like this. Hearing about how we "Struggled with finding clothing that suited our style and budget" in the Niagara This Week newspaper is not how I wanted you to find out. It's not that I didn't WANT to tell you, it's just that it's a part of our dark past that we've spent countless hours and dollars trying to forget.
Yes, it is true. All throughout high school, Ken, Andrew and I "struggled with finding clothing that suited our style and budget". We were relentless with searching for clothing that would suit our style. Other kids had it easy. There were dozens of shops in our area that carried products that would suit their style. But for us, Tommy Hilfiger and American Eagle would never do, and we would've rather had sex with a campfire than wear anything from the Gap. While all the other kids were out getting dates, having fun, breaking windows, and not thinking twice about their clothes, we were up in our rooms constantly scouring Ebay for apparel that would satisfy us. Tearful sleepless night after tearful sleepless night, we'd come back empty carted. Sure we got lucky a couple times, and found some pieces of clothing that were acceptable for us to wear, but how were we supposed to stretch them for an entire school year? We couldn't wear them every day. We weren't drama kids for God's sake...And people would notice if we just swapped clothes between us. No, most of the time, being completely out of any other options, we were forced to attend classes in the nude. Now, I don't know if you've ever been to Ontario in January, but it's not exactly the warmest place in the world. Combine that with trying to fry bacon for your quiche in 10th grade home ec without a shirt on, exposing all your cuts and bruises from the ebay sesh the night before, while the pretty preppy girls just stare in horror. Not a pretty picture.
I really can't be blamed for wanting to keep this a secret, but there it is. If you want to hear the rest of the story, you can do so HERE.
-Eric Pause ¶ 4:19 PM
